27th October 2010

Sunset in Anzio

the sunset in Anzio

No music to listen to today, no book to read either.

I took a walk, picking up shells mentally imagining earrings, or how beautiful they would look on my dresser.

Oh, and the thoughts came along too; they weren’t to be left behind..how noW??

27degrees, the weather is amazing here. I wish you were here with me. Who? I don’t know either. All I know is that a walk on the beach is meant to be shared with someone….Anyone..ok, maybe, not anyone, but someone special –

I was thinking about how weird it was, how weird that its just the beginning and the decisions though hard, they have to be made.

I miss the calm my life had, uncomplicated things that didn’t need a walk on the beach to think them through. This is a whole new experience for me; I really wish there was someone I could talk to. And that it wasn’t so complicated. My BFFs would know what to tell me….*^* helped, but she likes someone else, i wish it was me. I don’t know why. I liked it better when it was just me.

And this men who just don’t get it. Like get a CLUE already! I’m not interested in a short term relationship; if its not the real thing, its nothing. I need time to grow up. I don’t like to be rushed…to be made like I have to be constantly making choices, it sucks.

Its like i’m becoming dead inside; the only thing that drives me is that I have to make this 6months the best time of my life. If I fuck up, it will be nobody’s fault. Its all about me. Me!

Anzio, I wouldn’t mind relocating here; I know it’ll be awesome..there’s just a dreamy quality about it. And the beach, the sea, it looks like a postcard, like Montecarlo, Ibiza and Nice wrapped into one….haha, i’m having a moment. The kids will love the beach, and my little dog coco….sigh

-the broken arrow will be mended-

 

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About shashaixx


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