Category Archives: FeelGoodVibes

+My Emancipation Journey+

I’ve started on a new page.

God is in control of my life. I let Him go 2years ago, and I have been very sad ever since. I have acknowledged the big role he has played in my life.

I almost had a fatal accident two weeks ago. I literally saw the hand of God. I have been suicidal, and just when I’m about to give up, something miraculous just happens. I appreciate the prayers my parents and even my grandparents have been saying for me. Part of this journey too, is because I had really really hit rock bottom.

Then I literally experienced the ‘a door closes another, another one opens’ cliche. I was talking to a friend of mine in school who recently gave his life to Jesus and it’s those really unexpected people. I was shocked when he started the topic and then proceeded to share a book with me about to hell. I have established, I don’t want to go to HELL. It’s a bad place, a scary place, that wasn’t made for humans.

This past few days I’ve been praying, for myself my family and my friends. My only problem thus far is forgiving. The day i totally forgive the man that was in my life, I’ll believe how strong I am. I pray about it all the time. That’s the only way I’ll stop hating him for lying to me constantly, for cheating on me, for treating me like I was nothing. For saying horrible things about me to our friends. There are so many things, and it’s hard to forgive because I wake up each morning and it feels like I have to pick up from where I stopped the day before, trying to fix my tarnished reputation.

The day I wake up and everything feels fixed, I guess, is the day I’ll know I’ve forgiven him completely. I know that’s what God wants of me. My friend challenged me today, “If God can forgive the gravest of sins, why can’t you?”

I want to embrace this journey with God. Today a prophet gave a message for me from God.
That I like giving, and because of this, God will use me to do his work

That I am humble

He will give me concentration in my school work especially now when I’m juggling school & 2jobs.

That I shouldn’t stop someone when they are speaking

I have a big heart.

God has a plan for me. I’m starting on a clean slate. I guess I have to forgive the man that was in my life. My hesitation is costing me time, and hindering God’s work in me. I really have to change my lifestyle too accommodate His teachings.

The journey isn’t easy but I’m going to take the Lord’s hand and let him guide me.

I thank him for this EMANCIPATION

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…..I…..

I’m here in my room thinking long and hard. I have exams starting tommorrow, and I’m just so tired. I discovered today that M is finally graduating.  I remember when I used to be the first person to know the things going on in M’s life….anyway…I wish M only the best in life.

I read somewhere, that when you forget why you are hurt, then you are healed. I feel like that’s a done story. That ship has sailed, It’s probably in Iceland by now even.

Today, the new man in my life and I met. I have a confession, I am taller than him by half an inch. Today I noticed, I don’t know why. I don’t know why I’m already looking for a reason to  jolt. He is perfect. And I haven’t spoken to him the whole day, like from 12 pm and I’m feeling sick. Am I falling in love. I have been reading and drifting off, thinking about him. I feel a bit stupid because we both have exams and I’m probably the one overthinking.

I love his presence in my life…Honestly I do.

I need to pass this exam I have tommorrow, lemme continue reading.

I hope everybody had a good easter weekend, I wish you all the best in the week ahead…xoImage


March was Awesome.

Exams are coming up in 2days. I am prepared…I feel like I am. The past month, March was so good to me. I feel like I have never been at a happier place in my life. I feel like am on a constant high of happiness. I think the new man in my life that I mentioned in the earlier blog is responsible.

I have been through so much BS with men, I felt like I was done, then God sent this amazing guy who actually really likes me. Who appreciates me, who finds the weirdest things I do to be the cutest things ever. He tells me am beautiful, he knows what to say when I’m feeling sad. And for him, I think it’s the same thing for him. We realised yesterday that we started talking like each other.

It’s been so long since I felt fucking revered. I appreciate that feeling so much. I  want somebody that respects me, who understands me, who adores me, who gives me insight on things. I don’t want people who promote ganja or drink themselves to a stupor or who believe Sex is oxygen. That’s an immature person that cannot sustain a conversation…and those are so important to me, conversations I mean. I want somebody who has ambition, to be something, somebody…who even though they are 21years old, has the sense to avoid self destructive behaviour. I got myself an Old Soul, I like old souls…An old soul is a young person ie 22years old who is mature and doesn’t think like the average 22year old in society right now.

I digress. Exams are coming up. The end of the semester. I am so happy! I hate exams, but the next three weeks are going to be hectic for me. They come to an end on the 27th. I can’t wait for that weekend!! I’m gonna go crazy!


Carpe Diem

I’m feeling a bit low. I have been reading the Greatness Guide by Robin Sharma and sometimes, I feel really motivated to make a change in my life and try to make a change in the lives of the people around me. I have been so motivated this last two days, but today I woke up, later than usual and I was still so tired. I came to work today, I’m planning a photo shoot for this Sunday. I’m still scouting for the perfect location. Nairobi can be hard to work with sometimes.
I think I’m lonely. Like I need something to take my mind off things. I need a job too, I’m feeling abit broke. I have an audition today, my Agency called me up today and It’s in a few minutes and I’m wondering how i’ll up my mood before then…. :/

One of my close friends had a surprise party this past weekend and it was crazy. I looked so pretty, I have never gotten so many compliments in my life. My day had started on such a low note, I needed all that LOVE I was receiving that night. It was a perfect night. It was the first time I have partied with my new friends and I love them so much, we really went all out!! Then there’s this awesome man I met. He makes me smile, sometimes he makes me so happy, sometimes Not, I feel like he is playing with my heart, and my heart just can’t. So I need to extricate myself from that situation before it escalates into something I can’t control. He is almost perfect but there is still somebody in his life, who he doesn’t want anymore….anyway watch this space, I’ll keep you posted. He is also to blame for the little spring I have in my step nowadays 🙂

Life can get crazy, you might look for reasons why you want to do things and then not do them in the end. I think things should be done because they are fun and they make you happy. Carpe Diem: “Seize the Moment”


Fashion Junkiiee!!

Two things that I’m passionate about are writing and fashion…and photography and music. I registered a new blog: www.fashionjunkiee.wordpress.com this blog will be solely to do with Fashion, and I’m very excited to launch it… J

I hope you like it…this just goes to say that nothing is impossible. On that note, something random is happening in my life!! I’m a fashion designer. I sincerely never knew I had it in me. Check out www.kashamagazine.com at the Fashion and Style section. We were lucky to be featured in this online magazine and I’m ecstatic that they loved the pieces!! Of course mum is too, and I’m so happy that she’s finally getting the recognition she needs. She’s a creative genius!! They even borrowed some pieces from the line Madoido (we promise to come up with a better name for the next time) We have received a lot of feedback from people which is very encouraging and I am just shocked, of course!! And I used my sisters and my friends as models for the shoot, and I’m so happy that they brought out the outfits so beautifully. Thank You guys so much…Kisses!!

Yes, I’m working with my mum, but until I start Law school and things start to make sense, I have to do this, plus its something that I’m passionate about to say the least. I hope that many people feel that way and continue to support us. Already we are designing clothes, my second OMG moment is that today we designed a dress for a young lady who saw the Madoido collection and she is a presenter at an awards ceremony in New York City. I wish she could put me in her suitcase. I digress. And her co-presenters are Don Cheadle and Giselle Bundchen!!!!! SQUEEEAAAALLLL!!! I’m starstruck because they’ll be in their Gucci and their Marc Jacobs outfits and she’ll be wearing a dress made by Keri Fashions!!          

Find Keri Fashions on Facebook and like our page so that you can get information on discounted rates on our clothing and accessories and also on give aways. I will be doing those on my fashion blog too so stay tuned!! We are also on twitter @kerifashions                                          

It’s all very inspiring. So my message today is to say that you have to believe in yourself, prove yourself and others wrong…you can do anything, really!! Look at me!! How random is all this design shiznit?? And I’m sorry that I’ve not updated the Broken Arrow in a while. There just never seems to be time nowadays!

And tomorrow is my babe’s birthday…I’ve never been this blank…thinking up ideas for the perfect gift…Someone kill me now!! I’m so screwed

 😛 Stay fabulous my lovelies…x


.Homestretch.

I really need to post something today because I just need to, its been long, that’s all. I won’t give a smart answer.

This past weekend had me all over the place having those last moments with the people that mattered the most to me while I was here. And they all insisted that I cook something from home for them…I made Pilau and Chapati…I should have done something simpler you think….well, I don’t like Ugali that much so that one was out. I decided though to just risk it whether my efforts backfire or not, whether my rice ends up looking like ugali and my chapatis become pancakes…I was content with the fact that they don’t really know how they both taste so I was safe, and also the fact that this was a way of thanking them for the hospitality….I wanted to share with them a part of where I come from.

It was a bit sad really. Surprisingly that story has a happy ending, the food and everything…no tears! 🙂

Next week I will write down the lessons that I have learnt. Today I’m a bit sad. I had the last day at the office. I never thought that I would get attached let alone emotional about it….but I haven’t handed in the key yet. I think the most painful moment will be when I’m handing Max the key to the apartment…I’m sure I’ll weep even.

Today I have been listening to 3songs on rewind…*Mbiguni, Malikia* and Coming Home all by Sauti Sol off their Sol Filosofia Album.

Mbiguni I must say just touches the innermost parts of me….I don’t know if it’s a love song, but to me not really. Its just this song, when I listen to the words, I just want to cry. I relate to this song on all levels. I wish I heard this song like 6-8 months ago, a lot would have been different. Basically with this song, they are talking about heaven, this girl who is tired of her life, she looks to heaven, she wants to reach heaven – you can interpret this literally or figuratively.

I don’t know what made me think that coming to Italy would solve the problems that I had, it just put them on hold. I go back in a few days and face them. But the best part is I know what to do. I’m not blank, I have grown.

I’m a lucky girl. I’m grateful to God for my family, my friends, my good health, and for this far that he’s brought me. Unfortunately, I’ll say the truth that this past few months I think I can say I have talked to God for a total of 10hours, something that I’m not proud of at all….and somehow all my shitty situations worked out, and I always thought I will sort my shit out alone…but I’ve been thinking about it this past few days, and I can say that its been him…all the way it was only Him.

*Mbiguni – Heaven in Swahili

*Malikia – Queen in Swahili

And I meet my mum in a few days. I’m going to Finland, my friend sent me an email and told me its -15degrees…the fuck?? I almost cancelled my flight. But I’ve  really missed my mum. I am so excited to see her!! I wonder if she’ll  recognise me, LOL, I kid. I know she will….that is making me smile so hard right now. I hope to take many pics, and I get to be in Prague too!!!…That’s my dream destination….its so fucking beautiful!! I have a stop over there for a few hours so I will take full advantage. I’m very excited.

A random pic for you all…I love Oxfords…!!

Kisses Everyone…Remember Live, Love, Laugh….there’s so much beauty in everything.

xxx


Marilyn Monroe wasn’t a bimbo…..

I just need to get this out. Not all the beautiful girls in this world are stupid. Like really. We aren’t [see how I infuse myself in to this ;)] Anyway, everyone assumes that If you’re hot, you don’t have to work that hard, someone will come along and marry you and buy you diamonds or whatever, but it’s not always like that. I’m sure there are beautiful people that LIVE by that notion. There are times when I’ve just met someone and we start talking or whatever and a few days later and they’re like, wow, there’s actually more to you than a pretty face. How do you think that makes me feel?? Go figure. Anyway, just so you know, I’m big on independence. I want my own sh!t. I never want to rely on anyone to provide for me.

Anyway, my point is, that it isn’t fair to judge someone by just that one look. I do that a lot too, I guess its human nature. But I stopped. Starting today.

On to Marilyn Monroe – Bimbo! Like really, that’s the only way we know her. This gorgeous woman with the black beauty spot above her mouth, sexy fuck-me-now eyes, and that white dress in my head right now, the halter one. She’s hot. Period..but even though she killed herself, I think she was a smart person – It isn’t smart committing suicide but oh well, maybe the thought of getting old and not being beautiful anymore scared her, I won’t go and search for the reason why she killed herself on Google, or watch E! True Hollywood story, really, I don’t care. In the end, we all remember her as this SEXY woman who lived a long time ago,and she would have been my grandma’s age right now. But she wasn’t just a pretty face, smoking hot body, and as we are made to believe, zero brains. She gave some ‘insight’ on life as we know it.

Marilyn Monroe fucking inspired this post today. Some of the stuff she said that I thought to share with you today:

“I’m selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can’t handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don’t deserve me at my best.”

“Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius and it’s better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring.”

“A wise girl kisses but doesn’t love, listens but doesn’t believe, and leaves before she is left.”

“It’s better to be unhappy alone than unhappy with someone.”

“Ever notice how ‘What the hell’ is always the right answer?” (All this years later, I still hear ‘what the hell’ being used..)

“We should all start to live before we get too old. Fear is stupid. So are regrets.”

“You never know what life is like, until you have lived it.

“This life is what you make it. Not matter what, you’re going to mess up sometimes, it’s a universal truth. But the good part is you get to decide how you’re going to mess it up. Girls will be your friends – they’ll act like it anyway. But just remember, some come, somg go. The ones that stay with you through everything – they’re your true best friends. Don’t let go of them. Also remember, sisters make the best friends in the world. As for lovers, well, they’ll come and go too. And babe, I hate to say it, most of them – actually pretty much all of them are going to break your heart, but you can’t give up because if you give up, you’ll never find your soul mate. You’ll never find that half who makes you whole and that goes for everything. Just because you fail once, doesn’t mean you’re gonna fail at everything. Keep trying, hold on, and always, always, always believe in yourself, because if you don’t, then who will, sweetie? So keep your head high, keep your chin up, and most importantly, keep smiling, because life’s a beautiful thing and there’s so much to smile about.

Everyone has different opinions about people. I think she was misunderstood. That is all I have to say. She was actually deep somehow.

Have a good weekend everyone, be safe…in all aspects. 22days to go home and tonight I miss the CD Launch of Sauti Sol…Ya’ll who will be there, represent. I wish I was there, but I have to work tonight too. I hear its an orchestra today…Yay 🙂

xx