I really need to post something today because I just need to, its been long, that’s all. I won’t give a smart answer.
This past weekend had me all over the place having those last moments with the people that mattered the most to me while I was here. And they all insisted that I cook something from home for them…I made Pilau and Chapati…I should have done something simpler you think….well, I don’t like Ugali that much so that one was out. I decided though to just risk it whether my efforts backfire or not, whether my rice ends up looking like ugali and my chapatis become pancakes…I was content with the fact that they don’t really know how they both taste so I was safe, and also the fact that this was a way of thanking them for the hospitality….I wanted to share with them a part of where I come from.
It was a bit sad really. Surprisingly that story has a happy ending, the food and everything…no tears! 🙂
Next week I will write down the lessons that I have learnt. Today I’m a bit sad. I had the last day at the office. I never thought that I would get attached let alone emotional about it….but I haven’t handed in the key yet. I think the most painful moment will be when I’m handing Max the key to the apartment…I’m sure I’ll weep even.
Today I have been listening to 3songs on rewind…*Mbiguni, Malikia* and Coming Home all by Sauti Sol off their Sol Filosofia Album.
Mbiguni I must say just touches the innermost parts of me….I don’t know if it’s a love song, but to me not really. Its just this song, when I listen to the words, I just want to cry. I relate to this song on all levels. I wish I heard this song like 6-8 months ago, a lot would have been different. Basically with this song, they are talking about heaven, this girl who is tired of her life, she looks to heaven, she wants to reach heaven – you can interpret this literally or figuratively.
I don’t know what made me think that coming to Italy would solve the problems that I had, it just put them on hold. I go back in a few days and face them. But the best part is I know what to do. I’m not blank, I have grown.
I’m a lucky girl. I’m grateful to God for my family, my friends, my good health, and for this far that he’s brought me. Unfortunately, I’ll say the truth that this past few months I think I can say I have talked to God for a total of 10hours, something that I’m not proud of at all….and somehow all my shitty situations worked out, and I always thought I will sort my shit out alone…but I’ve been thinking about it this past few days, and I can say that its been him…all the way it was only Him.
*Malikia – Queen in Swahili
And I meet my mum in a few days. I’m going to Finland, my friend sent me an email and told me its -15degrees…the fuck?? I almost cancelled my flight. But I’ve really missed my mum. I am so excited to see her!! I wonder if she’ll recognise me, LOL, I kid. I know she will….that is making me smile so hard right now. I hope to take many pics, and I get to be in Prague too!!!…That’s my dream destination….its so fucking beautiful!! I have a stop over there for a few hours so I will take full advantage. I’m very excited.
A random pic for you all…I love Oxfords…!!
Kisses Everyone…Remember Live, Love, Laugh….there’s so much beauty in everything.