Honestly, I have the worst feeling ever. I feel like I’m choking. I’m supposed to be ok by now. As in, its the day before valentines and my life just feels like a fucking side show. I was so sure I’d have a Valentine this year. And the thing is I don’t believe in Valentines day. I believe in showing love all through the year, and that the feeling should be mutual. I thought I had that.
I miss M in my life so much, as in the past few days I’ve just been thinking about us. I don’t know why I’m holding on, I don’t know what i’m holding on to. I think there is an ex involved in my tumultuous relationship. I can’t explain it. I just have a feeling because how else would you explain an ex showing up all of a sudden in pictures?
I have exams tommorrow, two of them, but my mind can’t concentrate. I have this sinking feeling, it’s just depressing me.
Love is for fuckers. I quit drinking somehow, I indulge only when I have to. I quit smoking too completely but then again, with me you are never too sure about things. Sometimes I wonder if there’s really anything to live for.
Anyways, Nairobi is so hot!
The Broken Arrow will be mended.